MyTherapistNewYork

So I was reflecting on my experience with learning Spanish and I recalled something very useful. I find not many people realize a powerful hidden benefit from learning another language is how it relates to self-talk. Now self-talk is a pretty simple concept, but it is has powerful implications for our day-to-day functioning. The way we talk to ourselves is essentially an extension of our cognitive thoughts and beliefs, and our cognitive thought and beliefs are a very large factor in how we live our lives. Now what many people don’t realize is that there is an entire emotional paradigm that we have unconsciously associated with our native tongue. Every individual has a different emotional association to different words. For instance the word ‘Clown’ conjures up images parties and laughter to some people, but others horror and nightmares. Our mother tongue has a huge influence on our dominant emotional paradigm.

Where does learning a new language come into play? Well, if one has the experience of living in another country for some time and becomes completely immersed, the following is likely to happen: your entire emotional paradigm from your mother tongue is shaken quite a bit. Now this really happens after the initial (very frustrating!) months of not being able to express yourself properly. So being resourceful people, we pour most of our energy into learning how to speak the language. We then start to think and dream in the new language.

One of the cool things I noticed about this experience was that, once I was past the frustration, I had basically no emotional associations with the language. This was an extraordinarily freeing experience because it gave me the chance to form all the positive associations I wanted with the language. It also allowed me to opt out of making negative associations with the language that I had with my mother tongue. The negative self-talk was one of the things I didn’t allow to transfer over to the new language. It just took WAYYY too much energy to have negative thoughts about myself in a  foreign language!!

Sooo moral of this post: try learning a new language, and notice the self-talk (good or bad) that is embedded within the language of your mother tongue. Have fun with it! I hope to see you soon!!

Original Article

Psychiatry and psychotherapy obsess on what’s wrong with people and 
give short shrift to what’s right. The manual of these professions is a 
943-page textbook called the DSM-IV. It identifies scores of pathological 
states but no healthy ones. 
—-exerpt from Pronoia by Rob Brezsny

The Anti-DSM-IV or The Outlaw Catalog of Cagey Optimism


* ACUTE FLUENCY. Happily immersed in artistic creation or scientific 
exploration; lost in a trance-like state of inventiveness that’s both blissful 
and taxing; surrendered to a state of grace in which you’re fully engaged 
in a productive, compelling, and delightful activity. The joy of this 
demanding, rewarding state is intensified by a sense that time has been 
suspended, and is rounder and deeper than usual. (Suggested by H. H. 
Holiday, who reports that extensive studies in this state have been done 
by Mihaly Cziscenmihaliy in his book, *Flow: The Psychology of Optimal 
Experience.*) 


* AESTHETIC BLISS. Vividly experiencing the colors, textures, tones, 
scents, and rhythms of the world around you, creating a symbiotic 
intimacy that dissolves the psychological barriers between you and what 
you observe. (Suggested by Jeanne Grossetti.) 


* AGGRESSIVE SENSITIVITY. Animated by a strong determination to be 
receptive and empathetic. 


* ALIGNMENT WITH THE INFINITY OF THE MOMENT. Reveling in the 
liberating realization that we are all exactly where we need to be at all 
times, even if some of us are temporarily in the midst of trial or 
tribulation, and that human evolution is proceeding exactly as it should, 
even if we can’t see the big picture of the puzzle that would clarify how 
all the pieces fit together perfectly. (Suggested by Meredith Jones.) 


* AUTONOMOUS NURTURING. Not waiting for someone to give you what 
you can give yourself. (Suggested by Shannen Davis.) 


* BASKING IN ELDER WISDOM. A state of expansive ripeness achieved 
through listening to the stories of elders. (Suggested by Annabelle 
Aavard.) 


* BIBLIOBLISS. Transported into states of transcendent pleasure while 
immersed in reading a favorite book. (Suggested by Catherine Kaikowska.) 


* BLASPHEMOUS REVERENCE. Acting on the knowledge that the most 
efficacious form of devotion to the Divine Wow is tinctured with playful or 
mischievous behavior that prevents the buildup of fanaticism. 


* BOO-DUH NATURE. Dwelling in the blithe understanding of the fact that 
worry is useless because most of what we worry about never happens. 
(Suggested by Timothy S. Wallace.) 


* COMIC INTROSPECTION. Being fully aware of your own foibles while still 
loving yourself tenderly and maintaining confidence in your ability to give 
your specific genius to the world. To paraphrase Alan Jones, Dean of 
Grace Cathedral: following the Byzantine ploys of your ego with 
compassion and humor as it tries to make itself the center of everything, 
even of its own suffering and struggle. 


* COMPASSIONATE DISCRIMINATION. Having astute judgment without 
being scornfully judgmental; seeing difficult truths about a situation or 
person without closing your heart or feeling superior. In the words of Alan 
Jones: having the ability “to smell a rat without allowing your ability to 
discern deception sour your vision of the glory and joy that is everyone’s 
birthright.” 


* CRAZED KINDNESS. Having frequent, overpowering urges to bestow 
gifts, disseminate inspiration, and perpetrate random acts of benevolence. 


* ECSTATIC GRATITUDE. Feeling genuine thankfulness with such 
resplendent intensity that you generate a surge of endorphins in your 
body and slip into a full-scale outbreak of euphoria. 


* EMANCIPATED SURRENDER. Letting go of an attachment without 
harboring resentment toward the stimuli that led to the necessity of 
letting go. (Suggested by Timothy S. Wallace.) 


* FRIENDLY SHOCK. Welcoming a surprise that will ultimately have 
benevolent effects. 


* HIGHWAY EQUANIMITY. Feeling serene, polite, and benevolent while 
driving in heavy traffic. (Suggested by Shannen Davis.) 


* HOLY LISTENING. Hearing the words of another human being as if they 
were a direct communication from the Divine Wow to you. 


* IMAGINATIVE TRUTH-TELLING. Conveying the truth of any specific 
situation from multiple angles, thereby mitigating the distortions that 
result from assuming the truth can be told from a single viewpoint. 


* IMPULSIVE LOVE SPREADING. Characterized by a fierce determination to 
never withhold well-deserved praise, inspirational encouragement, positive 
feedback, or loving thoughts; often includes a tendency to write love 
letters on the spur of the moment and on any medium, including napkins, 
grocery bags, and skin. (Suggested by Laurie Burton.) 


* INADVERTENT NATURE WORSHIP. Experiencing the rapture that comes 
from being outside for extended periods of time. (Suggested by Sue Carol 
Robinson.) 


* INGENIOUS INTIMACY. Having an ability to consistently create deep 
connections with other human beings, and to use the lush, reverential 
excitement stimulated by such exchanges to further deepen the 
connections. A well-crafted talent for dissolving your sense of 
separateness and enjoying the innocent exultation that erupts in the wake 
of the dissolution. (Suggested by Sue Carol Robinson.) 


* JOYFUL POIGNANCE. Feeling buoyantly joyful about the beauty and 
mystery of life while remaining aware of the sadness, injustices, wounds, 
and future fears that form the challenges in an examined life. (Suggested 
by Alka Bhargava.) 


* LATE LATE-BLOOMING. Having a capacity for growth spurts well into old 
age, long past the time that conventional wisdom says they’re possible. 


* LEARNING DELIGHT. Experiencing the brain-reeling pleasure that comes 
from learning something new. (Suggested by Sue Carol Robinson.) 


* LUCID DREAM PATRIOTISM. A love of country rooted in the fact that it 
provides the ideal conditions for learning lucid dreaming. (Suggested by 
Kenneth Kelzer, aithor of *The Sun and the Shadow: My Experiment With 
Lucid Dreaming.*) 


* LYRICAL CONSONANCE. Experiencing the visceral yet also cerebral 
excitement that comes from listening to live music played impeccably by 
skilled musicians. (Suggested by Susan E. Nace)

(originally found here: http://www.infjs.com/forums/archive/index.php/t-1799.html)