Managing Anger and Frustration

By Nina Lei

“I feel like a robot.”  One of the kids in my partner’s first grade class told this to him not too long ago.  When my partner asked him why/how he felt this way, the kid responded, “Like hurting people’s feelings… Like when a robot is first made, sometimes it doesn’t know what to destroy.”

Aside from being impressed by this 7-year-old’s imagination and creativity, I felt for him and his feelings of anger and frustration.  I could definitely relate to feeling angry about something, and frustrated about not knowing how to release these powerful emotions in some way.  It’s like you’re stuck in a box with your emotions, and you can scream but it doesn’t help.

Feeling angry is part of life, and so is feeling frustrated.  But you can change the way you view things so that you can feel angry and frustrated less often, or so that these feelings have less power over you.  The truth is, no one or thing can MAKE you feel anything.  It is your perception of the person or situation that creates the feelings you have.  By learning to change our way of viewing things, we can feel better – whether that’s from feeling less angry and frustrated or from being okay with feeling kind of angry and frustrated sometimes (which is okay too, as long as you see that your negative feelings won’t change the person or situation).

Everyone feels angry and/or frustrated sometimes.  But if you feel like you could use some help in managing these emotions, feel free to contact me or one of my fellow therapists at 

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