Sex Positive Couples Counseling

Couples counseling traditionally involved practitioners whom are trained to discuss underlying relationship issues and communication problems- but would you believe they often do not approach the topic of sex unless the couple brings it up?! 

Sex is at the very bottom of Maslowe's hierarchy of needs (you might have heard that from 6th grade health class)- right along with eating and breathing! The importance of a fulfilling sex life shouldn't be underestimated, and there are therapists that can help. Sex therapy is a form of talk therapy where you meet with a therapist and discuss any issues or concerns you have regarding anything to do with sex.  Therapists who practice sex therapy are health care professionals and hold ethical boundaries which include not having physical contact with clients.  You don't have to be in a relationship to seek sex therapy, and sex therapists work on issues ranging from premature ejaculation to mismatched libidos to gender and sexual identity and expression.

A sex therapist helps people to talk openly about sex in a safe and judgment-free environment.  The therapist works collaboratively with clients to help identify and solve issues surrounding sex. Clients develop a self-awareness of their behaviors and how it contributes to the  presenting issues. Then clients create goals and collaborate with the therapist to devise a road map to help guide them to the right direction towards better, more satisfying sex. The sex therapist does not steer the couple in any direction that they don't want to go. Sex positive therapists encourage imagination and welcome different types of sex, however we do not impose any particular view or sexual preference.

Sex therapy often uses the PLISSIT model. 

  • Permission - When you just need to know you aren't the only one in the universe with this struggle, and you want to know that you're "normal"
  • Limited Information - closely related to permission, when people have Limited Information, they often don't have a very comprehensive knowledge of sex education, so sessions aim to teach them a bit more about the anatomy, physiology and psychology of sexuality
  • Specific Suggestions - this is more behavioral modification work. For example if you have premature ejaculation, your therapist might assign you homework exercises to teach you techniques involving edging- masturbation or other sexual stimulation to the point of orgasm, but not past the point of ejaculatory inevitability 
  • Intensive Therapy - this is about more medium to long term cognitive behavioral work to process any longstanding habits, guilt, trauma or other unhealthy emotions and behaviors you might have concerning sexual expression


MyTherapist New York offers sex therapy for individuals and couples that is modern and effective. Start the New Year off right by designing the sex life you want to have, not one you think you SHOULD have based on half-truths informed by porn, religion and magazines.

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