Do you ever look at your partner and think, “OMG! YOU ARE SO ANNOYING! WHY CAN’T YOU JUST DO WHAT I WANT YOU TO DO!?” A recent article from psychology today, “Do These These Toxic Thoughts Threaten Your Relationship?” , talks about common “toxic” thoughts that many people have about their partners. The article states that too much focus on these thoughts can destroy relationships with significant others, something we also see in therapy. Negative thoughts about your partner will inevitably happen, especially since they are such a large part of your life, however, when these thoughts become a primary focus, it can tear a once, functioning relationship, into a tumultuous, dysfunctional relationship. The article says, “Happy, satisfied couples that do not get bogged down in toxic thoughts have a better, more realistic, and healthy way of thinking about each other.” That’s where couples therapy comes into play!
Living in New York, the city that is overworked, overpriced, and never sleeps, can be stressful enough, without factoring in common relationship stressors. Being a therapist in New York City, I realize that couples may need help to stop this “toxic thinking” that’s mentioned in the article. In therapy, we will work through the style or Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) to challenge problematic thinking and help you have a more functioning and happier relationship with your partner.